Orphaned

Today, 
I feel, am orphaned...
orphaned before time...
before age....
before I could grow enough 
to take care of myself....

I am orphaned by distance,  
to misery, 
to memories which never subside.

I am orphaned by silence..
to lawless collisions with fate,

and 
to be in absolute solitude, 
to seek my answers alone, 
and never see the new dawn...

I am orphaned by love,
which could never grow,
care which you could never
show,
I am orphaned, yes I am....

Ruins........
ruins always remain, contain, within us....
a sense of regret, maybe refrain.....
I like ruins....
They remind me of the remembrance...
of good or bad.... then worse......
I recall, I feel...
the need to grow....expand,
but the ruins stay.....
always as a memory......
I adapt to the ruins
but do they adapt to me.....
They don't.... They never would.......
n yes, they never could.......

 I am belittled by them,
by pain n moments, seen, followed........
which haunt me....
I feel happily haunted by memories in the remnants of my ruins.......
This idea of ruins n remnants has always intrigued me....
I think of them as treasures.....
some bright, some dark.......
most darker than the rest.....
but I know they remain with me forever.....
I see them....in me, around me.....
everytime I look into my eyes,
I see the last remnant of joy......
the joy which once was faith......
is now just a tear......
I see thru my heart thru these sparkling tears......
its full of pain.....
its contains the remnants of time, space,
a hollowness undefined.......

The day is gone, passed on to night,
The silence creeping in, through the shadows of darkness,
The feelin of fear, regret and sorrow,
Breathin through the night, tonight, every night............I long for a union with my soulmate,
The one who would relieve my pain,
Embracing me in the closed warmth of soil,
Of a peaceful end, tonight and forever........

Important one.....

http://www.ted.com/talks/noel_bairey_merz_the_single_biggest_health_threat_women_face.html 

best one ever.........

http://www.ted.com/talks/richard_dawkins_on_militant_atheism.html 

Interesting one....

http://www.ted.com/talks/tyrone_hayes_penelope_jagessar_chaffer_the_toxic_baby.html 

Steve Jobs

http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/en/steve_jobs_how_to_live_before_you_die.html